Last night as a ate tuna straight from a can while sitting on the couch in a ripped singlet with my mascara half washed off, I had a horrible realisation.
I was watching an episode of Sex and the City, for oh, I don’t know, maybe the 501st time, and it got to a scene where the “girls” are about to go out for a meal.
I got all excited for a moment and for a split second actually felt like I was about to go out with my friends.I was just a blink away from slipping on my Dior dress, fluffing up my hair, and saying into the camera: “I had to wonder …”
But then it dawned on on me that actually, I was at home in my pyjamas eating sweet chilli tuna straight from the can, totally poised to lick the lid.
This horrible experience made me think, holy shit, I actually need some kind of life that doesn’t involve watching re-runs of a show I’ve watched so much I actually think it’s some kind of documentary on my friends and our glamourous lives and sexually transmitted diseases.
So, here is a wish list of things I would like to achieve/do at some point in the near future (don’t hold me to these because guess what, it’s likely I’ll rediscover season one of SATC like some feckin mummy’s tomb).
– Go to a dancing class. I’m talking hip-hop, jazz or something sexy like salsa.
– Get myself some music lessons for a certain instrument that was bought by a certain someone for a certain anniversary.
– Sit down with one of Joel’s many guitars and teach me some rock songs.
– Write some fun lyrics Lady Sov style, so I can team up with Timba-J and tour the world.
– Find some new music – my iPod has actually given up on surprising me with new shuffle mixes and instead plays the same songs in a similar order.
– Start a special writing project with my sister, aka Bubble.
– Do a mysterious walk a workmate told me about from Spit Bridge to Manly that takes five hours and is through some awesome bushland.
– Start sewing, mending, adjusting and generally cooling-up clothes like I used to.
– Go to Melbourne, hopefully with Joel if he ever stops studying and going to Bathurst and generally being a douche.
– Learn how to take awesome photos.
– Fix all my broken jewellery.
– Find some awesome recipes and feckin’ cook them.